Wednesday, July 27, 2016

Mom's Lost it.....

You know..Lexie was braggin' just yesterday, that we haven't managed to break our mom, yet. Well, we may be close. She lost her camera.

Now, you have to understand, she hasn't been even outside alll day, much less gone anywhere. She looked all over..every room, under & in chairs the bed...even the pantry & (can't believe I'm saying this..the freezer & refrigerator). Dad had put some clothes in the wash...& yep, she even stopped it & checked there. Me & Lexie followed her ar
ound the first & even the second tour around the house...then we got bored. It was kinda interesting when she went thru the 2 big bags of garbage, we watched that...just in case she found somethin' good. All of a sudden...she's just standin' in the middle of the kitchen, w/her hands on her hips & is givin' Lexie the "eye". Lexie is just layin' there, lookin' normal w/that goofy grin on her face. Next thing we know, mom is walkin' the backyard..not once but twice. No camera.

She comes back inside & is about to start allll over again, with us on her heels..tryin' to help.  Dad told mom to take a break.."it's here somewhere".


 Mom's tired & frustrated ...she picks up her old camera & shows it to Lexie. Lexie sniffs it, & then mom tells her to "find". Dad just starts laughin'. Mom tells him..."I'm desperate & it's worth a shot". Lexie goes to work & is sniffin' all over the place..movin' pillows on the couch, lookin' behind our beds...her nose is goin' into overdrive. I'm watchin' this & thinkin'...she don't even know what she's lookin' for...but she sure is doin' a good job of lookin'.

Mom bends over to pick up one of our toys, & guess what? There's her camera..sittin' on a stack of magazines, right by her desk! In the meantime...Lexie is still lookin'. Now, mom feels bad...first for thinkin' Lexie had stole it (it really was a  possibility)...& second, for puttin' Lexie on a search for ?? (we still don't know what she thought she was lookin' for).

So, she calls us both to her & tells us to go "hide our eyes w/dad in the bedroom:. We go in there w/dad, & he closes the door. In a few minutes, she opens it, lets us smell her hands & tells us both to "find". Wow!! She hid cheesy balls & liver jerky all over the livin' room!! It was so much fun!!  We reallly scored!!

So, everything turned out ok..we're happy, we got to play a game & got treats. Mom's happy she found her camera...but she says there's still somethin' missin'...her mind. (Note to Mom: if you want..we'll help you "find" it ).

Monday, July 18, 2016

The Siege

<shakin' my head>....I just don't understand why mom insists on givin' me a lil' grief, when I'm just tryin' to rest up a lil'. After all, that seige, AHS has been goin' on lasted for two days. Lexie an' I are takin' some well deserved nappin' time.
Plus, she still refuses to acknowledge that criminal elements do not respect boundaries, much less keep normal workin' hours. It is not our fault trespassers are breachin' our yard at all hours. But it is our duty to get rid of 'em. She doesn't acknowledge the fact we've kept them from invadin' the house...well, mostly...
The first alarm that somethin' was amiss was about 2:30am, yesterday mornin'. Here's the AHS log--
2:30 am, Sat----Lexie sounds the alarm an' calls me. We hear somethin' on the patio...an' call mom....again....an' again....I finally go an' make sure she's awake & after pawin' her..she gets up an' lets us out....(for some reason, she's not grumblin' nice things)
2:45 am, Sat----Mom's at the backdoor orderin' us to desist & stop our efforts to get whatever has retreated under our deck before we wake up the entire city. After a minute or two & determinin' that she seems a tad upset & is usin' "that voice", an' she's outside in her jammies, no lite, an' barefooted....Lexie an' I abandon our quest.
6:00 am, Sat----Dad lets us out....finally......yep...that critter is still under the deck. Lexie an' I redouble our efforts at gettin' him to come out. It's a lil' frustratin'....both of us have tried pullin' up them big boards to no avail.
6:10 am, Sat---Mom's at the back door....an' she's not happy....again', she orders us inside..after as much resistance as we felt we could get away w/.....we came inside. She locked everythin' , an' we all went back to bed.
8 am, Sat.....Mom finally got up, let us out...an' we immediately went to work on them boards...sniffin' between 'em, under the deck sniffin'.....tryin' to dig thru 'em.....nada....nothin' was workin'. Mom decided to "help"...she was waterin'...so, she sprayed under the deck an' thru the top to try to flush that critter out. All she accomplished was makin' it go from one side of the deck to the other...all underneath. In short....it didn't help.

After awhile of all this....Lexie an' I decided to go inside when dad came home for lunch...an' then it rained. Mom locked us inside.

5 pm, Sat......Lexie an' I were back at it. I thought we were makin' some progress.....Lexie started on openin' a access to the side of the deck to crawl under, I was still workin' on the boards......managed to get some deep scores, but had to quit when I hurt a toe an' have a limp. Mom made us come in...due to my on the job injury.

10:30 pm, Sat....The critter is still under the deck. Lexie an' I both verified it....we still haven't been able to evict it. We weren't out there very long before mom was makin' us stop. She said she was tired of hearin' about it....well, duh...if she only understood our frustration...

4:30am, Sun......Good thing dad had to get up early....Lexie an' I were waitin' by the backdoor to resume our efforts to get rid of that critter once an' for all. We were determined....doubled our efforts at yellin' at it an' workin' on some kind of access to under that deck.

4:30 am, Sun----Mom's yellin' at us to get in the house...she didn't even try to be polite or quiet about it, either. We were forced to stop.

Sunday....off an' on all day long, we worked on that deck. Mom tried the water hose again....heck, at one point, she got a hammer an' banged on the boards. That helped some....that critter kept runnin' from one end to the other...but he was still under the deck 'cause everytime he tried to escape...either me or Lexie was there. It was a good effort, but no pay off.

10:30 pm, Sun.....It was our last call for the nite (accordin' to mom)....Lexie an' I were back on the job. I was so frustrated!...an' let everyone know it. After a bit, mom called us in....I wasn't givin' up....Lexie went inside, convinced it has escaped. She even watched me from inside...but I wasn't so sure an' just had to keep investigatin'.

5 am, Mon.....dad let us out, an' we ran immediately to the deck. Did a thorough search, from one end to the other...includin' all sides an' around the deck....it was gone. Lexie was right...I guess....it had escaped...an' I verified it. We went back inside w/out anyone havin' to tell us.......the siege was officially over.

I'm officially loggin' this in as a "WIN" for AHS....we may not have apprehended the trespasser, but we made it hot enough that he realized that stayin' in our territory was not a viable option.

I think mom's gonna have to give me a lil' personal time to nap for all the stress I've been thru an' stop tryin' to wake me up. If she's tired...maybe she needs to nap, too. After all, our goal is to take care of her security so she can sleep w/out any worries....so, I don't understand all her grumblin'....

Thursday, July 14, 2016

Shots Fired

I just couldn't believe it! Dad was workin' late, Lexie an' were left in charge of mom. It was a quiet evenin' ...until...about 9:15pm...
"POP...POP!!!"

Lexie an' I both jumped up an' ran to the front of the house after first checkin' mom was ok.....Mom jumped up 'cause she heard it, too...an' folllowed us to the kitchen. The lites were off in there, so she looked thru the blinds on top...I looked thru the blinds on the bottom.....Lexie stood guard behind us.

It was all still an quiet...then we saw a lite across the street in the neighbor's driveway. As we watched, we saw it was the neighbor an' she was headed out to the street & was talkin' to our next door neighbor.

Mom double checked lookin' up an' down the street, an' even checked the backdoor. Then of all things...she went out side in the front. I sure didn't like that....I couldn't keep an eye on here from the kitchen, so I went up to my tower. Don't know why she thinks just 'cause other peoples are outside that it's ok....anyway, I didn't make any noise, wantin' to keep the element of surprise if needed. I could see her talkin' to the neighbors, then even watched other neighbors come outa their houses on both ends of the street to where she was. Pretty soon, there was a lil' group of people all talkin' about the "pops".
Some of the people thought they were firecrackers....but we hear those things off an' on all the time. An' noone comes out in the street 'cause they hear 'em. Mom was pretty sure it was a .22....especially since she's heard one bein' shot over an' over not too long ago at the gun range.

Bein' mom....in the middle of all these people....she finally kinda stopped the discussion an asked it anyone bothered to call the PD..."no" was the answer....so, she told our nextdoor neighbor who had his phone in his hand to call. (She's really big on makin' official reports...."just in case", she says...."so there's a record", she says). The Police sent a car around an' said they say a group of teens an' talked to 'em an' told 'em to go home. The teens said they were firecrackers...but we all know better...at least now, they're on notice...that they will not be unnoticed if it happens again.

Everyone went back to their houses....neighbors that didn't know each other got to meet on common ground...the concern for our neighborhood an' families. Mom came inside, an' me an' Lexie were there to meet her an' make sure she was totally unscathed. She said we did a stellar job, by bein' on alert an' keepin' watch...am more important...not givin' out any warnin's....'cause she agrees that we don't always need to announce the fact we're on watch.

All good....an' ended good....Lexie an' I got big cookies for a job well done....mom got a matchin' endin' to her day...although, she muttered somethin' about next year "how about not startin' her day w/a crime scene kitchen an' not endin' it w/gunshots". I'm not promisin'...but I'm pretty sure somethin' will happen....it always does.

Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Where's CSI when you Need 'Em?

Well, it's mom's birthday, an' we all decided to let her sleep in.  Dad got up about 6 an' closed the door to the bedroom, but I wasn't havin' it.....I made him open it so I could get up in bed w/mom.  (That's our time...mornin' snoozin').  He spent the mornin' puttin' her dishwasher back together.
After she got up, she grabbed a cup of coffee amongst all the stuff in the kitchen.  It looks like it blew up...she still can't believe all that stuff was under the sink..but grabbed her coffee an' a donut an' decided to pretend it wasn't there.

Dad finally got it pretty much all back together.  The dishwasher works...but now leaks.  Mom's pretendin' that's not happenin', either.  She's decided that it's her birthday an' she's choosin' not to even think about upsettin' stuff....just pretend it isn't there.  Kinda like when she took a bite outa that donut when sittin' by the c'mputer an' a big pile of powdery sugar fell out all over her black pants an' the floor.  Lexie an' i were right there to do clean up...so, mom's all good about it.  It's like it didn't happen.

Then......dad came an' asked her if she had cut herself?  "What?"  "Why?"..."Where?", were her response, as she got up an' went into the kitchen......where there was an' obvious crime scene.
Guess she hadn't been fully caffeinated when she got her coffee, 'cause she didn't even notice the blood splatter all over the floor, cabinet (well it did kinda blend in)..or the cream door to the pantry a lil' over two foot high (that she can't believe she didn't notice).

Dad cleaned it up, but mom found some he missed an' called me an' Lexie over to explain.  We knew right away what she was talkin' about an' gave it a good sniff.  Then she found a lil' piece of cabinet baseboard by our food dishes, that matched the missin' spot by the stove.  She then gave us a complete physical check to eliminate us as the cause of the bloodsplatter.  (I can just see her googlin' for a dna test kit.....she claims w/us she needs one)

We let her know we needed to recheck her pantry an' she opened the door.  It seemed all good to us an' we decided to end the meetin'...leavin' mom w/a small blood splatter to clean up, a piece of cabinet floor board....an' a fear of findin' a corpse somewhere.

We know mom loves readin' those mystery books...so, Happy Birthday moml   Love ya!  <3

Thursday, July 7, 2016

AHS File 7/7/14

AHS File 7/7/14 approx 0200 hrs.......After puttin' mom an' dad to bed an' makin' sure they were secure an' asleep in their bed, I went up to my command post in my tower (like I do every nite, unless mom's roamin' the house or not sleepin'...then I stay down w/her). Anyway, I was up there keepin' watch on the comin's an' goin's of the neighborhood. Bein' summer an' the teenagers on the prowl, not to mention that one stray cat (I can't stand him...he's just out an' about to drive me crazy)...there's been more action at nite, more so then usual. Last nite was no exception.

Was thinkin' it was just "that darn cat" again, their excuse for not takin' me seriously? Yessss!

I saw a prowler, roamin' the neighborhood...goin' house to house....I even sounded out a warnin'.....did anyone get up (mom or dad) to see what was goin' on? Noooooo! Are they sorry now? Yessss! Was it just that "cat"? Nooooo!


Maybe they'll be takin' me more seriously now..... that prowler that was goin' house to house checkin' for unlocked vehicles.  Lucky for them he took off after breakin' into the truck across the street an' takin' all the stuff outa it. At least the criminal took me seriously, an' decided he better get while the gettin' was good when he heard me roarin' from my command tower. Doubt if he'll be comin' back any time soon...especially on my side of the street or my driveway.

Case Closed....CEO of AHS...Bailey

Saturday, July 2, 2016

Bed Games

Dad worked over last nite...which is ok...but he didn't clear it w/us. Lexie an' I went to the door all excited about three times around his normal time, only to find out he wasn't here, yet. When he finally came home, we met him...but we met him w/a bunch of complaints...loud complaints. Lexie an' I were yellin' at him, at each other..an' just generally complainin'. He finally got the message, changed clothes an' gave us each one of his lil' mints he carries in his pocket (I admit, I'm kinda addicted to those lil' Altos mints).
That settled us down for a bit. But I hadn't forgotten about him changin' his routine w/out notice.
Mom was tired an' went to bed, dad was still up catchin' up on his c'mputer stuff. I decided that just maybe since he changed his comin' home time...that maybe he changed his goin' to bed time. So, I got up in bed w/mom...on dad's side...an' on his pillow. Mom an' I were snoozin, when dad decided he wanted to go to bed. Well...."sorry....I claimed thist spot....the couch is available"...was my response, an' I laid my head back down an' closed my eyes.
Then dad tried to roll me over...he was pushin' me! I wasn't movin'...nope, nada, not gonna happen...I was there first. He was pushin' harder...I had enough an' told him! We had a kinda loud wrestlin' match goin'....then he pushed me hard enough for him to kinda scoot in bed. I got up....and stole his covers an' went to the foot of the bed. "Take that!", I thought...see how he likes sleepin' w/out the covers. He wrestled me for the covers ( I finally let him have 'em) , an' I stretched out at the foot of the bed w/my head on mom's feet. She was all stretched out an' comfy. I was all stretched out an' comfy....dad was on his side of the bed kinda' scrunched up...but, hey...he was in bed, don't know what he was grumblin' about. I sleep curled up lots of times...an' he didn't even have anythin' hangin' off the bed.
Maybe he'll stick to his routine from now on, is all I've got to say..