Proof We're Always on the Job

AHS Official Report......May 14, sometime in the afternoon of all times.....Mom an' dad left to go 'who knows where" leavin' us to "guard".  Oh, I'm pretty sure they think we just sleep an' goof off while they're away.   We take our responsibilities seriously, an' since we're in charge of our operation, it's not like we actually need 'em here.  (As you know, they sometimes get in the way.).  So, to be proactive an' make sure they know that we're on the job, we decided to present a lil' tableau of showin' our prowess at security an' "guardin'".  (Not to mention that we did expect some kind of bonus)
They finally came home.  Then mom checked her phone.  She had missed a call, so she grabbed the phone an' walked outside w/us.  She went an' sat down on the deck to the left.  We were waitin' an' watchin'.  Sometimes she's clueless an' obviously blind, but we're patient...we know she'll snap to it sooner or later. Sure 'nuff, she finally turned around to take the phone back in the house....that's when she made one of them really funny noises.   Lexie went right over an' pointed out the body an' was telllin' mom alll about it.  I did a double check on it, just to show mom that we finally got that grandfather of all possums...in broad daylite no less.  (It was me, actually, there's no way I'd let Lexie tangle w/one that big...plus I had to drag it off the fence).   An'....I didn't let Lexie take it into the house, but did approve of her takin' it up to the house to present as evidence of a job well done.  (Mom appreciated that)|
After her initial heart attack feelin' shock, she told us we did good an' to go in the house for a treat!  Woo hoo....I knew we'd get a reward!  Even Lexie was excited an' went in the house.  Of course we knew mom was gonna lock us in, an' get rid of the evidence...but that's ok...we'd been keepin' an eye on it for the hours she was gone an' were bored w/it.  She went an' got dad.  He an' the neighbor came an' took it away...they were even amazed at how big it was.
We've been on a high the rest of the day...enactin' the capture w/our stuffies over an' over.   That an' lots of bitey face an' chasin'...all in the livin' room.  We just can't seem to tire of the story of the hunt an' capture.  I think mom's a lil' over it, though...she's given us another chew (score!!).

Squash Leaf Thief

Had another mystery solved for mom.  It wasn't very hard, it's like she wakes up in a new world sometimes, just plumb forgettin' the past.  It's either that, or she keeps doin' the same thing  w/the same factors in place an' figurin' there'll be a different outcome for some reason.  See...she has this big round planter w/some lil' squash plants in it. It's one of two she planted.  The other one is doin' good.  It's got big plants w/blooms on it.  The ones in the round planter are kinda puny an' some of the leaves looked like somethin' was eatin' on it.  So, mom thought it was gettin' too much shade an' moved it to another place.  I sniffed all around where it had been, then checked it out in the new place.  It looked fine to me.
Later, mom & I was on the deck.  She was talkin' on the phone, when I noticed the culprit....Lexie.  She was right over there at that big round pot chompin' away on them squash leaves.  In fact, she was slowly walkin' around in a circle makin' sure she sampled each plant.  Then mom noticed her, too.
Mom sure wanted to yell, "NO!!!!!!", at Lexie, but she couldn't 'cause she was on the phone.  Mom poked me on my back, I looked at her an' she was furiously pointin' at Lexie, the squash leaf thief (try sayin' that 5 times fast).  She didn't have to poke me twice.  I launched myself off that deck an' straight at Lexie.  I knew what I had to do...divert.  I gave her a big push an' then took off across the yard w/her zoomin' right on my tail.  After two circles around the fig tree an' grape arbor, we had a grand wrastlin' bitey face.  By then, Lexie was ready for a dip in her pond....all thoughts of her squash leaf salad bar outa her mind.  I went back to the deck to let mom know I took care of it.  She gave me a big pat on the back, an' as soon as she was off the phone I followed her in the kitchen where she gave me a big bacon chew.
You see, I totally understand my responsiblilites....gotta keep mom happy, but gotta take care of my staff, too.