Sunday, December 14, 2014

Dark an' Stormy......

It was a dark an' stormy nite....not so much outside, 'cause the sky was clear an' that moon was shin'in' brite.  But inside the house....after midnite....that was mom's demeanor...not to mention dad's. Again...not our fault...AHS is on call 24/7, ready for action when any kind of threat or breach occurs.  We do NOT set the timeline.  I've told mom time after time.  Ne'er do wells, transients, furry criminals...don't  have a 9-5, we have to adapt to that.  Don't know why she don't understand.  Anyway, about 1am, Lexie an' I had a situation....a breach of security in the back yard.   Mom had let us out w/her usual "come RIGHT back"'s not our fault that there was an intruder.  We did get a lil' loud for a bit, but as soon as I apprehended the critter, I came "right back" inside, to assure mom that everything was once again safe an' secure.  I left the criminal w/Lexie.  (Don't know why, but she likes to watch 'em for awhile to make sure they aren't gonna  jump up an' create more havoc.) Me?  I'm not interested in 'em at all after I've got 'em.  ("Do it right the first time" is my "do overs").
So, mom goes to the door an' calls Lexie.  She sees her run toward the path to the door...but then take off toward the fig tree.   Mom goes out a lil' further an' calls her, again.  Nope, Lexie's not comin'.  Mom got a lil' suspicious an' got a closer look...sure 'nuff...Lexie is walkin' around w/that possum hangin' outa her mouth.  It's kinda funny...'cause that possum has a really long tail an' Lexie's kinda short, so she's havin' to hold her head way back to keep from trippin' on him.  After a couple of circles tryin' to get close to Lexie to tell her to "drop it" comes back inside to get her lite.  I got bored watchin' this action...seen it before an' know how it's gonna turn, I went up to my tower to see if there was any breaches in the front yard.
Mom finally just stopped on the deck an' waited by the backdoor.  Lexie did, too, w/her possum.  Mom talked to her an' told her that cookies would taste a lot better then that nasty possum.  Lexie was thinkin' it over...lookin' at mom...lookin' at the back door...lookin' at her lil' door...all the while still holdin' that possum.  Mom was gettin' a lil'' finally told Lexie not to even think about takin' that possum in the house an' to "leave it".  Lexie put that possum down an' then laid down by it to think it over...."cookies"..or "possum"..."cookies" or "possum" was a big decision for her.  Mom was a lil' afraid to move...she could just imagine Lexie decidin' to take her possum an' go ask dad (who was asleep in bed) if she could have both.
Finally....Lexie left her possum w/one last look an' went inside to the kitchen w/mom close behind her.  Mom gave her big praises an' put cookies in both of our food bowls.  Lexie was happy w/her decision an' started gobblin' up her cookies.  In the goes an' closes Lexie's lil' door, grabs her goes back outside closin' the big door behind her.  There's no way she's gonna leave that possum on the patio right by the back door.
Mom gets her pitchfork, the possum an' heads for the back fence w/her lite.  Now, she likes her tall fence...but it sure makes it hard to throw possums over it w/a short pitch fork an' one handed in the dark w/out that possum rollin' or crawlin' back up toward her hand (it didn't but that's been known to happen).  Thankfully, her mission was a success.
All the time she's traipsin' across the yard an' back...Lexie has finished her cookies an' figured out what mom was about, an' she wasn't happy.  She for some reason, thought mom would leave her possum, an' she could continue her "watch".  As you know...Lexie can get quite vocal...we're talkin' LOUD when she's not happy.  Mom could hear her clear across the yard...I even came downstairs to see what was what.  Worse even got up to see what was goin' on.  He opened the door for mom an' asked why she was out there an' we were in the house makin' all that racket when he had to get up in just a couple of hours.  All mom said was, "I thought you might sleep better w/out a possum in bed w/you...I know I will".  After that, all lites were turned' everyone went to bed.  Lexie was still a lil' miffed, but mom told her to go to bed an' "outside was closed".  I went up to my tower.  About 10 minutes later...I couldn't believe it...there were cats!  In my' in the yard across the street.  I was livid!' loud!  Mom didn't take me seriously at all....she got' closed her bedroom door an' went back to sleep.  I don't think that was appropriate at all....what if it had been a real burgler?  She needs to come up to my tower an' see for herself.....all I can do is send out warnings.  It's not like I can jump outa a second story window an' apprehend 'em.  Anyway....Lexie an' I are takin' a lil' extra time to rest up this mornin'...we gotta be fresh...who knows what's gonna happen tonite...  :)

Sunday, November 23, 2014

"Booms" make Lexie push the limits

We had a big storm w/booms, rain' an' wind blow thru late last nite. Outside was closed before it hit.  Mom was tired of dryin' us off. We knew somethin' was comin', an' kept goin' in an' out in the drizzle.  Our excitement level was pretty high, an' mom was wonderin' if we had somehow gotten into the candy corn.  Although she wanted to just curl up on the couch, we wanted to run wild an' rampant.  At one point she thought she'd have to peel us off the ceilin' especially when the impendin' storm was bein' heralded by lots an' lots of booms. Now, I'd just as soon run wild in the house then go out in the rain.  It's more fun, we've got an audience, an' I don't get wet...not to mention that I understand what those "booms" are.  They just mean rain, wet an' mud.  Lexie's thoughts on the matter are different, they just push her buttons.  She's convinced someone is out there makin' those noises, an' she's determined to find out who.  So, she wasn't takin' "no" for an answer, much less the "outside is closed" answer.  Finally, at bedtime, mom turned out all the lites an' told us to go to bed.  We did. It was ok w/me...but Lexie couldn't sleep.  She was mullin' that "boomin" an' the "outside is closed" over an' over in her fuzzy lil' stubborn head.  I could almost see her set that jaw an' make up her mind to challenge mom's authority about closin' outside.  An' that's what she did, but she waited till about 1 am. I guess hopin' mom had forgotten, since she had been asleep. hadn't forgotten, she got up and told Lexie the same "no", "outside is closed" an' "go to bed".  Lexie gave her some argument, but went an' plopped down in dad's chair.  Mom went back to bed.  About 30 minutes later, just enough time for mom to drift off asleep,' for Lexie to mull it over some more....Lexie starts demanding loudly to go outside.  If she could stamp her feet, she would have...I tried to back her up (quietly)' was there at the back door w/her, just in case she got her way an' we got to go out.  It wasn't rainin', just wet outside.   Here comes mom...she didn't even turn on any lites...but I could tell she was lookin' at determined as Lexie was.  I stepped outa the way to watch the show.  Surprise!  Mom grabbed Lexie's collar an' lead her to her bedroom w/me followin' to see what was what.  Then she closed the bedroom door w/us in there w/her an' sleepin' dad, an' told us in no uncertain terms to "go to sleep".  Ok..I thought this was cool, so I laid down on my blanket by mom.  Lexie was sittin' by me...thinkin'.   About 3 minutes later, Lexie started complainin' about the door bein' closed. That resulted in a kinda loud quietlike "LEXIE, NO....GO TO SLEEP!" from mom.  I'm guessin' that Lexie decided that mom was serious an' not givin' up, so she jumped up in bed w/ try another tactic.  She's a wiggler..a big wiggler when she gets in bed w/mom.  Oh, she likes to cuddle an' be petted..but she just can't settle down.  She was rolllin' an' wigglin' an' makin' all kinds of lil' squeaks & grunts, even at one point was layin' on mom. Finally, she gave' jumped off the bed to go to sleep on the floor by the door (I'm guessin' to make sure she was the first one out when it got opened).  This mornin', it's a brite an' sunny mornin'...the squirrels are jumpin' from pecan tree to pecan tree. We've been out since about, both of us are nappin' comfortably in the in my tower...Lexie on dad's chair.  Mom's drinkin' coffee an' ...well, I'm thinkin' she's about to disturb our peaceful slumber...not sure why.........

Friday, November 21, 2014

Turkey Gravy

Well mom's been out shoppin'....she went w/dad an' got out food.  (I always like to gt that first bite when that bag is cracked open...that's the best.  In fact, I don't let dad pour it into our bin till I get it..right outa the bag).  She also came home w/some mattressy stuff...I think she's startin' to get serious about makin' me a new bed.  She came home w/somethin' the other day that said it was dog bed filler...but me an' Lexie didn't like was too a giant pillow, so she took that back.  Then after lunch, dispite the dark skies an' rain...she was off to the grocery store...not her favorite place.  She always ends up gettin' more then she went in for.  She even tries to not even get a buggy hopin' that curtails it some.  An' then there's the forgettin' somethin' (today it was the p'nut butter..we're out),  You might think a list would be would..if she'd remember to have it w/her.  On top of all that, she really wants a button on that pay thing to say "no, the amount due isn't alright, but I'll pay it anyway"' more often then not, somethin' happens.  Today, was no exception.  There's always a wait in line, mom's pretty much resigned herself to that fact, it gives her time to catch up on them trashy magazines, lol.   There was one line w/only two people in it, so she headed that way.  The man in front of her made a big deal of gettin' out of line because the woman checkin' out was taking too long gettin' her stuff outa her basket.  Now, mom had issues w/this...first was the fact his wife was made to walk behind him, an' he was rude bossin' her to follow him to another checker, second...the fact he only had a few things an' could have helped the elderly lady get her things out of that basket. Mom got up there an' helped finish unloading that basket, an' the lil' old lady was appreciative. It made mom feel good that the bag boy offered to help her take it out to her car. Then it was mom's turn to check out.  Another young man came an' bagged up mom's groceries, an' mom was on her way home.  Me an" Lexie like to oversee any an' all new bags of grocery....just in case there's somethin' new.  Mom unloaded all of 'em, then started puttin' 'em up.  That's when she discovered she had some extra items....two packages of turkey gravy mix, and a  pound of margarine!  That made her feel really bad....'cause she remembered that before that man moved outa line, that lil' ol' lady had a pie, an' was askin' the price.  Whatever the price was, it was more then she wanted to pay an' she put it back.  Obviously, the things she was buying were for her Thanksgivin' dinner....probably for family that she was expectin' to come visit.  Now....she's home an' has discovered that she paid for gravy an' margarine...but didn't have it.  Mom's got it, didn't pay for it, doesn't need' has no idea who that lil' lady was, on top of all's dark an' rainin', now.   She put it up, but it made her feel sad.  To perk her up, Lexie an' I decided to finish unloadin' the rest of the groceries.......for some reason' she was laughin' at us, just 'cause we were havin' a bit of trouble w/that big frozen turkey in the entryway, it was spinnin' an' slidin'....I swat it one' Lexie'd swat it the other...we weren't gettin' anywhere w/it, but it sure was fun...until mom rescued it.  She gave us each a bully stick as ransome' for makin' her smile.  No problem, mom....that's what we're here for.

Thursday, November 20, 2014

The Case of the Daisy Coat

Well, just let me tell you about mom's latest....she lost Lexie's daisy coat.  It got down to close to freezin' an' mom couldn't find it anywhere.

She finally put Lexie's other one on (the one w/flames).  Now, it's on her list to "fix", 'cause those lil' "sleeves" it has are just hard to get on an' even harder to get off Lexie.  Mom thinks if she just puts velcro stuff on them lil' arms an' wrap it'll work better.  So far, she's just been ignorin' it an' lettin' Lexie use her daisy coat that fits her perfect. A it was dark an' cold, an' that coat was nowhere to be found.  Mom was pretty sure she didn't throw it away in the mornin' trash....but it wasn't in the house.  So out she goes w/us w/her trusty lite an' bundled up to see if it somehow came off earlier in the day.  I don't know why she thought it was necessary to give us a warnin' about steppin' in somethin'.  She's the one that was on poop patrol earlier, & we have no control over them brown leaves...just sayin'.  We did our patrol of the yard while she traipsed all over the yard w/that lite.  She was successful in missin' any pitfalls an' "landmines",  successful in collectin' 3 pillows, a tiger, my fuzzy ball, an' Lexie's kitty, but unsuccessful in findin' that coat.  She came in the house an' told dad that it just has to be out there...but she couldn't find it an' that she'd look for it first thing in the mornin'.

So...mornin' comes, bein''s not cold anymore.  Mom goes out an'' finds the coat hangin' on the grapevine right where she put it when she took it off Lexie for the Christmas Pictures.  Not only that...there's no tellin' how many times she walked past it and didn't see it.  Does she take any responsibility for this?  No....she got the coat an' blamed me an' Lexie for drivin' her to this sort of behavior.  I beg to differ...we haven't gone for a ride lately much less gone drivin'....

Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Power Naps

Mom's kinda grumpy this mornin', an' has declared it a "no nap" day.  Geez, she just doesn't get it.  An' to be perfectly honest...I was snoozin' pretty comfortably up in my tower when Lexie sounded the alarm at 1 am.  In fact, I kinda ignored it....up until I heard mom come outa her bedroom at 1:30 an' have a very short an' terse discourse w/Lexie which invoved "no", "bed", "no"..."go to sleep"..."you're not goin' outside"....stuff like that.  I came down to see what was goin'' who was gonna win this argument.  Mom did...she she went back to bed an' shut her door, leavin' me standin' in the livin' room an' Lexie layin' on her bed w/a stubborn look on her face.  I went back to my tower. Lexie musta just been givin' this all a "think".   2 am....Lexie sounds off again...first at the back door...then at mom's door, then back at the back door.....then I hear mom again goin' over all the same stuff...just maybe a lil' louder...endin' w/a "OUTSIDE IS CLOSED!!!".  Then everythin' followin' the closin' of mom's door got quiet......for about 15min.  Yep...Lexie was not givin' up...nope, nohow, no siree.  It was a cold, clear, an' still nite just prime for critters to be about.  An' the added enticement of the motion lite comin' on in the back...well, there's just no way it could be ignored.  Figurin' the "three times a charm" rule was gonna come into play, I came downstairs, again.  Sure 'nuff, there was mom in her pj's standin' over Lexie at the backdoor.  Mom was usin' that "look" on Lexie...but Lexie was just vibratin' w/anticipation (she knew she had won).....then mom pointed her finger at Lexie an' said the magic words...."ok"...and "you come RIGHT BACK!...RIGHT BACK!".   Then she opened the back door an' I think when Lexie raced out she actually touched the ground about 15ft away, as she bounced off the deck to hit the backyard. Mom gave me a "that means you, too..right back" as I ran out.  (Hey, I'm not gonna pass up an opportunity like this).  We zig zagged all over that yard. Mom was waitin' on us, doin' busy stuff like gettin' stuff outa the freezer to thaw for dinner, checkin' emails...I came inside in a timely fashion an' checked in w/her.  I know her "right back" is only about 10 minutes, 15 at most.  Naturally, I got a prize for bein' the "good one", a prime piece of cheese.  Then mom waited for Lexie, who was pushin' it for as long as she could.  At about the 15 min. opened the backdoor an' called her.   Lexie was closeby, just enjoyin' lookin' out over the yard an' came inside waggin' her tail an' as pleased as punch (which made mom give her that "look" again, which Lexie didn't see or chose to ignore).  Mom asked her if she was ready to go to bed...finally...Lexie grinned an' plopped down on her bed.  Mom couldn't resist an' gave her a couple of pats as she headed back to her own bed.  Then gave me a hug an' a pat.  I headed back upstairs wide awake, now, to keep watch on the neighborhood....bein' the day the trucks come pick up all those bags on the street, I was anticipatin' some stray cat, r'coon, or some kind of varment checkin' 'em out.  Now, back to the problem of mom bein' a lil''s all in learnin' to pace yourself.  If you take power naps durin' the day, then you're ready for anything...24/7.  Mom just doesn't get this, no matter how many times I tell her.  Right now...Lexie's hangin' over dad's chair sleepin' (mom's already plottin' on wakin' her up)...I'm up in my tower restin' my eyes listenin' for those theivin' guys in that big truck stayin' outa her

Wednesday, November 12, 2014

Sometimes it's the Ride

Mom an' dad were gone most of the afternoon..shoppin' an' who knows what.  As soon as they got home, mom jumped outa the Hummer an' hopped across the driveway to the lil' sidewalk we got by our front door.  I had been up in my tower watchin' for 'em to come home, an' started to race to the front door when I just had to stop an' watch mom stand on one foot (did I forget to mention it's cold outside?), an' turn on the faucet an' wash the bottom of her shoe.  It did look strange, it's s'posed to be black, but it was splotched w/brite turquoise now.  Seems she was lookin' at somethin' an' walked right smack into a big pile of paint in front of the  hardware store. Then she had to hop to the Hummer on one shoed foot an one bare foot, holdin' that splotchy shoe.  (She hates bare feet in public places.."ewww"). Well, she tried to get it off, but it had now, she's got a artsy shoe bottom.  Then she got the' wasn't happy.  That ol' postoffice sent back one of her lil' packages she mailed last week, sayin' it needed more postage.  Grrrr...I could just hear her.  She was mad..again...she took 'em to the post office in the first' put on all the stamps they told her, they want more.  Well!  She came in the house..went an' put on another pair of shoes....grabbed the'..then she said, "c'mon, Bailey, we're goin' to the Post Office"!  Wow..just me an' mom..I was ready, an' at the front door waitin' for my lead.  She put on my lead, opened the door an' we went out....but then...somethin' flashed right by us....Lexie!.  Lexie w/no lead Lexie. Me an' mom were frozen in shock as Lexie bebobbed across the lawn...w/no lead.  Mom yelled at her..then calmly called her as we raced toward her.  Mom opened the hummer door an' told Lexie we were goin' for a ride an' to get in the truck. Lexie was across the street by then.  Mom told me to get in an' then took off my lead an' shut the door.  Then she headed toward the street, just as a car was comin' around the' Lexie was startin' to cross back.  Mom told her to "' what do we do? Lexie..sit!"  (that's what we do whenever we have to cross the street).  Mom kinda stepped out in the street to slow the car surprise...Lexie had sat an' was just sittin' there across the street as that car passed on by.  Then mom called her again' an' told her we were goin' for a ride. Lexie started across the street right to mom.  Mom turned back to the hummer to open the door for Lexie, only to see me lookin' over the back seat watchin' all the action thru the wide open back door. (Dad had fogotten the mom's bags of soil in the back an' had left it open).  Mom says at that moment she figured that if she hadn't had a heart attack thru all this...she's good for anythin'.  Her life didn't flash before her eyes, but ours did...Lexie runnin' the streets an' then I coulda been on the loose, too.  But none of that happened, an' mom had both of us loaded in the Hummer, an' we got to escort her to the post office to remail that lil' package.  When she got there, she realized that gettin' upset about that package an' the post office wasn't really important.  What was important, was the three of us enjoyin' the ride!

Sunday, October 26, 2014

The Battle of Water-ewww

Ok...soooo....some of you may know my trials an' tribulations w/a certain someone.  Well, one of my pet peeves is the condition she leaves  our water bowls.  Oh...I'm very aware of her passion for pond divin'.....snoopin' in anythin' an' everythin'.  The fact she loves to spend every single moment outside, in any kind of weather...usually the messier the better.

The Culprit....Lexie...aka-Dirt Magnet

Oh...don't be fooled.....her beard looks ok in this picture...why? may ask...'cause she's already gotten a drink outa not one, but all three of our waterbowls.  Yep, mom gave us each one....then added another.  It didn't help...Lexie runs in' proceeds to drink outa each an' everyone of 'em......

Now...I ask you...would you drink outa' any of 'em?  I take one look at '' would rather go drink outa' the pond  (which I do) place of choice, an' one I demand multiple times from mom at all hours (don't know why she grumbles so much in the middle of the's not like it's far) mom's sink in her bathroom.  I love that cold runnin'' the best part...Lexie's too short to drink outa it.  Oh, I can an' have turned it on myself...but I like to keep mom makes her feel important.  Besides, she really grumbles when she finds the water runnin' for no tellin' how long.  I don't see a problem, really, I kinda like ti that way.

Hmmm....what have we here?' w/ice.....water!!!!!

Oh my gosh...this is soooo good.....

This is best idea, yet.   My own personal water bucket....cold don't melt...and the best thing Lexie's too short to reach the bottom of it.  What do you mean I can't keep it?  It's borrowed?  WELL!   I'm puttin' in a requisition form immediately for my very own...I think I deserve it for all the work an' responsibility I have around's not like I ask for the moon or anythin''...I even got a name for it...."Bailey's Private Cool Cooler".

Let me know when it comes we have to return this one right away?

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

AHS....On the' Collateral Damage...

Collateral damage, mom...collateral damage.  You know as well as I do that even the government puts out warnin's about suspicious strangers leavin' packages unattended in important places.  What can be more suspicious then someone runnin' up to our porch, unannounced, leavin' somethin'...then runnin' off? Huh?  If they weren't up to no good...they'd walk up our walk to the front door like normal people.  I don't care if they were wearin' a could be a disguise.  I don't know ' don't know ', you should be glad to know, that because of my vigilance, they have never been successful at invading our home, an' everybody is still safe.  Once again, they ran off like the cowards they are.

Oh....that was a package that dad ordered...well,'s a good thing I, at least, still follow AHS protocals.  It mighta been an impersonator, you just can't be too careful, just 'cause he had the truck, uniform, an' dad's package...that just don't mean anythin'.....  What kind of "normal" person (stranger) runs up to people's doors an' then runs off in broad daylite like they don't want to be seen?  People up to no good, that's who.  Besides, you've been talkin' about takin' those blinds down to clean....I got you a head start on 'em.......  Now that my job is done down'll find me up in my tower.....   :)

Lexie wants another Biscuit

It's nice to get recognition an' appreciation from your lil' this mornin'...all she wanted was another lil' piece of one of mom's biscuits.   As soon as Lexie told me, I went into action an' got mom to give us another one.  Lexie told the story on her FB page.  It's true, I don't always pay attention to her...I've got a lot of responsibilities...but I have to tell you, she's a lil' pest sometimes, but she's my pest an' she's special to me......
"I have to tell you that it's great to have a big brother (sometimes).  I was outside keepin' squirrels away from my daddy's pecan trees while mommy an' daddy were having breakfast.  Then I heard mommy call me inside.....she gave me an' Bailey a biscuit.  (We had to share it.)  After that, she went to do some other stuff.  Me an' Bailey were still in the kitchen....I could see there was some more of them biscuits on that plate.  Mommy an' daddy weren't eatin' '' me an' Bailey were right there...w/no' we really like 'em.   Soooo...I pointed that plate out to Bailey...he checked it out...then called mom.  She was ignorin', he went to get her (I followed him).  He told her he wanted her to go w/him...that he had somethin' to show her.  I ran ahead to the kitchen an' placed myself in front of that plate.  Mommy could tell that Bailey was bein' real determined an' serious about her goin' w/him, cause he was bein' loud.  So, she told him to "show her"....Bailey whipped around an' made a beeline to the kitchen, w/mommy right behind him...then he "showed" her that plate of biscuits.   She got the message alright, an' we was sittin' right there waitin' when she got one of them biscuits an' broke it in half.  Then she gave them halves to us.  We were satisified....'cause it was only fair that we got a whole biscuit each....not just a half.  Bailey don't always pay attention to me...but he sure can get a point across to mommy.  :)"

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Mom's Family Fishin' Trip

I just dunno about mom, <shakin' my head>.  She goes off on a lil' trip w/dad, they take the boat, leave us guardin' the gone for days.  Oh...she arranged for M'shell to sleep over, tellin' us that we had to guard her, too.   I suspect that's not the real reason...probably just a ruse for us to keep an eye out for each other an' outa  trouble.  In the mom an' dad go, totally unsupervised.  There's no tellin' what kinda stuff they can fall into...especially mom.  She gets into situations here at home w/out any outside help.  Anyway, they both made it home.  As far as I've been able to determine...she's all in one visible damage.  Believe me, as soon as I could contain myself, I gave her a good goin' over.  Lexie about had a conniption fit tryin' to jump, wiggle, jump, run, jump, spin, jump, zoom..all over mom an' all in about a 4 foot area...not to mention she was soaked an' splashin' water everywhere.  We had heard them pull up in the driveway an' back that boat in.  Lexie was in the pond, an' got so excited, she swam to the deep end to get out an' soaked her  Most of that water was now one the floor an' mom, lol.  (Needless to say, we were a lil' excited).
After we all settled down, an' they finished unpackin' an' mom got the washin' machine goin', she started tellin' us what happened on their lil' trip.  It's a wonder we ever let her outa the house.  I just know it's her...stuff like this only happens when she's involved...either that, or no one else ever admits to it. This is just one of the "excitin' things" that happened...they were all out in dad's, dad, papa, Aunt Terry, Aunt Karen, & Uncle Steve, had been out fishin' an' were on their way back.  There's just a lil' channel that goes thru lots of sea grass w/drop offs an' stuff.  Dad's boat's got a thingee on it that tells' 'em how deep the water is all the time, which is important.  Anyways, they were zippin' along w/dad an' Uncle Steve drivin' an' checkin' the depth.  Mom was sittin' in the copilot's chair (she ain't allowed to sit anywhere's else when the boat's zippin', 'cause of what happened last time).  Aunt Karen was way in the back an' Aunt Terry was between mom an' her.  Papa was safely tucked up front.

There they were..just zippin' checked the depth an' it said 11ft........he turned an' went almost rollin' to the front.  All of a sudden, the boat came to an unscheduled/abrupt halt...a complete wasn't movin', much less doin' any zippin'. Dad gets himself up, mom looks back to make sure Aunt Karen was still back there an' hadn't fallen off or somethin'.  But she was ok, an' was leanin' over the back of the seat askin' mom if she had anythin' on her face.  Mom was still in a lil' state of shock but was able to say "nooo...well, except for those big splotches of mud all over it (with a lil' giggle, she sometimes resorts to humor in stressful situations...she says it's better then screamin'

Everybody was ok....but that ol' boat zipped about 15 feet into an uncharted muddy' got itself stuck.  Dad an' Uncle Steve got out of the boat, thinkin' they could push it back off.....but as soon as they sank to their knees in the mud at the front of the stuck boat....they told mom an' Aunt Karen an' Terry they were gonna have to get out an' help push too...'cause that boat wasn't budgin'.  The "girls" looked at that murky water, looked around at ..well, there's really nothin' out there but' finally climbed down to help...w/"ewwww" etched on all their faces.

They got out from the back  an' found themselves standin' in about 18 inches of murky saltwater w/ about 17inches of seagrass ticklin' their feet an' legs...again..."ewww" mom said.   Everybody pushed an' pulled....nada...that boat was stuck!  It had buried it's prop in the mud an' sand.  So...they all tried to lift it outa the can only imagine how that didn't.   It was lookin' bleak...but again..everybody was fact, mom was havin' a hard time givin' the situation the serious concern it deserved.  But like she kept remindin' one was hurt...heck the boat wasn't even was just' that's what that towin' insurance is problemo..just a minor set back...besides no one had  caught any fish anyways.
Then..outa nowhere, there comes another lil' boat...zippin' past on the other side of the channel.  Mom's sure they did a double take seein' this boat in the middle of the water...just sittin' there, w/ 5 people standin' in the water around it.  When it looks like they are gonna just keep goin'...they turned around an came back...then circled around to the other side where dad's boat was sittin'.   They discussed a plan w/dad an' Uncle Steve, and they determine that the best was is for them to swing dad's boat facin' them an' then pull it out that way (he knew the waters an' had probably done this before).

So, they tied a line an w/everybody pushin' while they pulled w/their boat (mom kept thinkin' it was just gonna be a matter of time before the five of them would do a face plant in that mud, but it never happened).  Just in a matter of minutes, they got the boat free an' dad was able to drive it to deep water, again.   Mom, Aunt Terry an' Karen...were still, they started walkin' towards the boats, thinkin' they were gonna have to do some swimmin' eventually.

Aunt Karen was in an' Aunt Terry were followin' behind her..Mom thought that was a great plan, she figured Aunt Karen was the youngest so she could go strikin' out first across all that sea grass.  Then she told Aunt Terry to just follow behind an' if Aunt Karen suddenly disappeared by steppin' in a deep hole, they'd know to go around (not to mention scarin' everythin' luckin' below away).

 About then, the guys that rescued the boat, told dad they were goin' to rescue the "girls" for two reasons. One, was because Mom, Terry & Karen's walkin' had stopped because they had noticed that Uncle Steve was wadin' in water up to his waist an' had collectively decided they weren't goin' there.  An' the second reason was the "girls" were standin' n that water all doubled over laughin'' couldn't walk much less swim...they had totally lost it at that point.

The rescueres got their boat right over where they were, an' pulled 'em one by one outa that water.  Mom didn't even lose her flip flops (she wasn't about to walk barefoot out there).  They even rescued Uncle Steve outa the water.  As they waited for dad to pull his boat up close, so they could hop from that boat back to theirs....Papa was still sittin' safely up in front an' wavin' w/a big smile on his face, which set off the laughter, again.

The rest of their ride back to the beach house was uneventful.  An' gave everybody a super special memory to laugh mom said, "no harm, no foul".  Dad did get the hose out to rinse the mud off the boat...especially the back....(there was an Aunt Karen clean spot, totally surrounded by mud where she had been sittin' before it all hit the ....).  The only pictures or took her camera outa her pocket when she had to abandon the ship....

Other stuff happened, tryin' to fish when you're surrounded by dolphins, or when somebody dropped their fishin' pole in the water between the dock an' the' everybody had to hold the boat off while somebody went swimmin' for it, or catchin' a giant bullfrog tadpole in a crab trap, seein' herds of skates (like small stingrays) swimmin' across the water like they were flyin', there was also a blood moon one nite, a lil' mini moon, someone caught an oil derrick an' had to rescue a fishin' line...all stories for another time....all in was a typical kinda trip for mom.  One thing for sure.. it's never boring.  

Sunday, October 5, 2014

Tis' the Season....for Nuts an' Squirrels

Another beautiful October mornin' an' crisp.  Here at the company headquarters for AHS (Airedale Homeland Security), there's lots to do.  We're finally entering into fall, which means cooler weather (it's hot down here in Texas).  Cooler weather means more activity from all kinds of varmits.  Fall, also means pecan season, an' this year looks like we'll have a bumper crop of them nuts, but it also means, squirrel season (they're everywhere).  We have to be vigilant an' check everythin' each mornin'.

Like dad's pecan trees....since they cut down the woods by our house, those crafty lil' tree rats have been tryin' to movin' into our pecan's just a horrible situation.  Right now, they get up in them trees an' cut them nuts off (they are not ready, yet)...take a bite, then throw 'em on the ground.  They'll try as many as they can get away with.  Then, when the nuts start gettin' good (next month), they'll be tryin' to steal 'em right off the ground where they, that's when it gets really exciting around

Not only do they steal 'em....they try to hide them in the dumbest in a lil' birdie's nest, that's just about nose level to me an''s not even a good pecan on top of that.  I think squirrels eat too many nuts, if you know what I mean....they say you are what you eat....

Lexie's been camped out on guard by the pecan trees since daybreak, givin' them squirrels heck....she's pretty effective an' keeps 'em on the' she never gives up.

We've not only got the trees, fence an' yard to worry about...but we've got the pond, too.  Gotta check to make sure all the fishies are A-OK.  It's not a hard job, an' it's nice to take a moment to "smell the roses" so to speak...just to enjoy....

An' maybe..give 'em a lil' poke....just to say "hi".....

Looks like everythin' is swimmingly good here in the, now back to the squirrel situation, then to see if mom has anymore donuts.....

Saturday, October 4, 2014

An Emergency on your part is not Necessarily an Emergency on ours

Today was a real Fall like day...ya know the ones that are cool in the mornin' an' warm in the skies, an' the sun shines just so...that makes everythin' look crisp. decided to go to the store, while dad was workin' on his boat in the front of the house.  Lexie an' I had a field day this mornin' 'cause them squirrels were feelin' frisky an' jumpin' from one pecan tree to the was' maybe a lil' noisy.   I'm not sure how long mom was gone... what with the squirrel chasin', keepin' track of dad an' what not.  But I'm sure glad she got home safely...especially considerin' her unusual speedin' around the corner an' zoomin' in our driveway....then runnin' in the house w/out her grocery bags or purse...she didn't even say nothin' to dad as she ran past.  She did slam the front door, her face all whitish as she yelled our names...then she ran straight to the back yard....still callin' us.  Nothin'....anybody could tell she was panicking as she kinda ran around the gardens callin' us.  Lexie an' I finally decided to go out there an' see what the emergency was an' met her as she was rushin' back in the house. We had been takin' advantage of the quiet time w/her gone an' dad outside to take a lil' upstairs where I could watch dad on his' Lexie in mom's bed.  We had no idea what had set her off, but she sure seemed glad to see us as she ushered us in the kitchen for some cookies an' hugs.  Then she went out to get her stuff outa the car an' tell dad she needed him.  Then we all found out what the emergency was that scared her so much.  As she was drivin' back to the house from the store, she looked across that field to admire our new fence.  There in the back corner, by where the woods used to be, was a big ol' hole in our new fence...she could see it from the road.  Boy did she put the metal to the pedal to get around that block to the house.  She remembered we had been out back when she left, an' dad was out, if we had gone on a walkabout, he wouldn't know it unless we came clear around all them houses to check on him.   So...that was why she was in panic mode.  Turned out, that hole was on the section that dad had left the chain fence up' we don't have access to that part.  Whew!!!  You can imagine mom's relief.  Dad got his tools an' fixed it....seems there weren't any nails in the bottom of a couple of them fence boards an' the wind blew them open.  Mom then started kickin' the bottom of each an' every board to make sure they were nailed down.  She pointed out a couple of boards that had splits in 'em an' told dad he's gotta change 'em 'cause they were bad.  Then mom declared that maybe she oughta put up the groceries, since they were on the kitchen floor an' one bag had ham in it......"HAM!"....Lexie an' I had been enjoyin' all this activity..but "ham"...well, we raced to the kitchen, an' mom found us w/our noses in the bags lookin' for it.  For some reason, mom wasn't even upset...she got the bags an' put 'em up on the table an' started goin' thru 'em.  When she found her ham...she opened it an' gave us each a slice.   Lexie an' I still aren't sure what all the excitement was about...but we sure liked the result.

Thursday, October 2, 2014


Lexie an' I try our best to test any product that we feel may be of interest to anyone out there.  We try to find good stuff that's fun, tastes good, not made in china (one of mom's criteria), all mystery ingredients, easily digestable,  an' is worth the money.  This last part is another of mom's criteria.  She kinda bases the cost of chews against how long it actually lasts, an' balks at payin' gobs of money for somethin' that lasts about nano second.  Which I don't understand, 'cause she never has any of that green money anyway...she just uses that lil' card whether it costs a lil' or a looks all the same to me...but what are we gonna do?  Lexie an' I are "kept", an' we can only hope that she remembers our level of expectation.  Our latest taste trial was these great smellin' Beef Tendons by Blue Wilderness Wild Chews.  It's a good thing they put 'em up high in the store...or they just might have been purloined.  They're not wrapped up in a package, just kinda shrink wrapped an' out there in the open.  She studied the package....the cost was  ($7.99 each) makin' her skeptical...but she was willin' to let us try 'em after readin' that they would "provide hours of chewing enjoyment".  Mom went thru the whole stack an' picked out the biggest an' thickest for our test.  We gave our approval right there in the store...but she said we had to wait till we got home (an' for if she don't trust us...she held them hostage in the front seat w/her).

So......we get home...eagerly await for the test to begin.  We barely let her even put her purse an' other stuff down..... I didn't think she was ever gonna get that shrink wrappin' off 'em.  Finally, she gave 'em to' we both made a beeline to the livin' room w/our tendons.

We didn't waste anytime gettin' down to business....they're not chewy like a rawhide, you've got to actually bite pieces off...

An' they're great for teeth cleanin'....'cause you can gnaw on 'em w/those back teeth.....

But..........if you'll notice...this was only three minutes of chewin'.....we've only got about 2inches left.....not countin' some of the crumbly pieces (which we cleaned up after..because they were good).'s our report.....
Pro....They are really really' are a good chew...good for the teeth...all natural, an' we like 'em says they have to be on sale for us to get anymore or maybe Santa Paws will bring us some if we're good (I'm hopin' I'm not lumped in w/Lexie on that score).  She says that they are borderline expensive...costin' about $1.60 a minute (she rounded up to 5 minutes).  An', once again, misleadin' advertisement....they did NOT give us "hours of chewin' enjoyment".....that was disappointing 

My questions is....why don't these companies ever use airedales to test stuff?  Who the heck are they usin'?  Dogs w/just gums? People?  I dunno...but I just want to put it out there...Lexie an' I are available to any company that would like to have their stuff tested an' given the AHS seal of approval.  Unfortunately, we're unable to give that seal of approval for this product due to the misleading statement...sorry, Blue Wilderness. Over an' out..... 

An addendum.....we made mom send a challenge to Blue Wilderness about these "long lastin' chews"...hope they answer.....stay tuned...... 

Tuesday, September 30, 2014

Once Upon a Time....

Once upon a time, there was a fabulous lil' kingdom deep in the heart of a country called Texas.   In that kingdom lived a king an' queen.  King Bailey surveyed his kingdom an' liked wh
at he saw.  He'd venture out checking all borders making sure all was right in his world.  From his special tower, he was able to see across to neighborin' kingdoms, an' be alerted to any threats of invasion.  Queen Lexie loved the outdoor gardens an' ponds, an' spent her days stayin' close to nature.  Then....the unthinkable happened.  Their peaceful kingdom was invaded, an' the king an' queen were banished....hours went into seemed to go on forever.......they had no control over what was happening in their lil' kingdom...what lil' freedom they was always in shackles...that was no freedom at all....isolation, imprisonment....the guards even tried what end?  Probably guilt at the injustice.....would it ever end?

The first indication of the invasion............

King Bailey...."You're kiddin', right?  I'm not really gonna be banished from my own kingdom?' for days?!", he says in disbelief

Queen Lexie sounded the alarm....."there's strange peoples out there!  We didn't give 'em permission to out there...what if they take our stuff?  Who are they?  What are they doin'?"

It's only been a couple of hours, but Queen Lexie is already becomin' despondent.....she's like a lil' fae....she gets sad when she can't be out in touch w/nature.  She's a true blue royal airedale (they're earth dogs, ya know)

Ok......she might be gettin' a lil' dramatic here....when the jailer tried to clean up...Queen Lexie tried to pull her "I'm dyin'..can't move routine".........the jailer didn't fall for it.  

The King an' Queen were taken out in shackles for exercise.  Sometimes paraded out around the neighboring kingdoms an' sometimes in their own.  At least now, they could see what was  goin' on.  Those invaders were buildin' big an' tall fences totally enclosin' their lil' kingdom.  No longer would they be able to  watch the world go by. 

Like I said...hours turned into the second day...."bonkers" was a word bein' thrown' not just used to describe the royals.......their jailer was lookin' a lil' tired...all the "walks"....some of 'em were..well...there seemed to be two different trains of thought of what the purpose of these "walks"' because of the "guilt factor"...the Queen an' King were takin' full advantage of this an' throwin' in some off the chart times.  (That jailer wasn't used to goin' for "walks" in the dark & she sure didn't seem to enjoy the "crack of dawn" ones).  They played that "give an' inch take a mile" card to the hilt & got away w/it.

Finally a boon was granted.....kinda....they were given limited access to their kingdom.  Not exactly how they would have liked it...but at least they could see what was goin'' they were together. 

As much as they had complained about bein' incarcerated,  they were now worried about bein' left tied outside.....unable to properly defend their kingdom.....worse yet....unable to have access to the cookie jar.....

But lo' an' behold....the Queen Mother came' sat w/them to enjoy the breeze an' fresh' she brought chips to snack on......

Finally.......hours, then a day....then it another day.....imprisonment seemed to go on forever....but was over.  The king an' queen were released.  

They checked it out.....freedom never smelled so sweet.......

Queen Lexie did have some complaints about the new view...though, an' let everyone know about it....

After a thorough patrol....King Bailey declared that all was right in his world...again.....

He could rest easily, now...after what seemed like forever (two an' a half days)...lots of confusion an' more invaders.....everythin' an' everybody he loves were all safe an' secure.....things were gonna be back to how they should be.

Not to be outdone...when the king left to do his nightly check from his tower...Queen Lexie took that opportunity to catch a lil' peaceful snuggle w/the Queen Mother herself...dreamin' of blue skies an'' her lil' door bein' always open....

To be cont'....