Monday, July 16, 2018

No Pitch Forks


An' mom was worried, lol. 
Mom an' dad said that maybe thin's had died down after the big "cat-gate" adventure of ours, when we had to lay low an' almost go into witness protection or somethin', since our pictures were splattered all over the neighborhood FB page (I still maintain it was the cat's fault...although Lexie really needs to learn to leave evidence behind an' not carry it back to the house like a trophy). 
It's been months....so, late last nite the folks decided to brave it all an' take us for a walk around the neighborhood.
Lexie an' I were all set...we don't have a problem goin' incogneatoooh....anythin' for a possible adventure, lol.
But as it turned out, everyone was locked inside their houses....there weren't even any cats loungin' under any cars or bushes. It was still hot, so maybe that was the reason. Mom even remarked when we were about halfway...that the walk was goin' pretty good, that we weren't bein' chased by anyone w/pitchforks, yellin' "murderers".
The cra cra dog still lives at the corner house, an' trashed talked us as we walked by. Lexie was w/dad an' she totally ignored him. I started to yell at him, but mom made me sit an' think about it.....so, I didn't. Like she said...he's probably jealous that he's stuck in there an' I was out an' about.
Then we met a guy w/a lil' weiner dog. The guy was nice, but that lil' weiner dog obviously had an elevated sense of himself an' was throwin' trash talk at me an' Lexie. We ignored him....he was just too silly to even bother with.
All in all, it was still a great walk.....not much goin' on...guess our reputation still precedes us. Mom's not sure that's a good thin', but me an' Lexie wear it proud. We don't care...our rules, you mind 'em or not at your own peril.
We were able to lay down some peemail in prime spots, to remind all the 4 leggers that we're still around an' we're still on the job.



Friday, July 13, 2018

New Stuff.....

Don't cha just love new experiences? I do......mom don't.

She knows I love ice. I love plain ice....an' especially ice from her sweet tea....but now....I've discovered somethin' new.....an' I don't want plain ice...nope....I want her ice from her glass of (oh my do it's so good!) vanilla cream soda!!!.....an' I don't just want the ice....I want my own bowl of that stuff w/ICE! 
An' I told her so! ...totally turnin' up my nose an' snubbin' the bowl of plain ice water she made me. Nope...I went right over to her desk an' pointedly showed her...her almost gone glass of vanilla cream soda.

She got the message...but it didn't turn out quiet like I wanted. To quote her, "to shut me up" (as if)....she drank it down to almost the "why bother" stage...then poured the rest w/the ice in my bowl.

Then set the empty glass on the table close by. (I think that was a pointed message). 

Well....not to be ungrateful....I drank it all down an' ate every cube of ice.....with gusto......then to be sure she knew that I knew that she was makin' a statement...I gave that empty glass lil' sniff, then walked by...right up to mom....an' dried my beard on her white pants to show my gratitude.

Friday, July 6, 2018

Imminent Danger.......

Yesterday was almost a repeat of the 4th....rain. But no wind an' not as much, justs off an' on. Just enough so the backyard just never had a chance of dryin' out, which didn't make mom super happy since she says Lexie an' I are like walkin' muddy mops (x 8). She finally just put down towels an' let it go.
Dad spent the afternoon drainin' the hot tub, 'cause the storm had pushed off the screen cover an' blown tons of leaves an' stuff into it. All those pretty pink flowers from the trees are all over the place, coverin' everythin' in sludgy brown.....

Then durin' the rainy afternoon, we all were inside snackin' an' just enjoyin' a movie time.....an' mom was washin' towels, lol.

It really was a pretty good day.

Last nite was when AHS had to go back to work.

Mom had closed outside at the first sign of trouble.

I posted myself at the backdoor an' stood (well, laid down...no sense bein' uncomfortable) watch for hours at the first sign of imminent danger.....the possibility of the household security bein' breached.


It sounded like a warzone goin' on right behind our house! Oh, I know about thunder...Lexie still thinks there's some "boomin' man"...but I know better, it's just some kind of cloud noise when it's rainin' hard. Good sleepin' weather as far as I'm concerned. She, also, thinks' them loud bangs are just another kind of "boomin' mens". Now, she might be closer to bein' right on that.

In the past, I've heard strange people behind our fence make those big bangs.....an' I've warned 'em to stay away an' yelled my displeasure at 'em.

This year, mom kept us inside at the first bang. So, I was reduced to just bein' able to guard the backdoor, in case they got into our backyard an' tried to get into the house. It's usually Lexie's spot when we're locked inside, but as head of security, I placed myself there.......she decided to protect the kitchen (go figure).

I can honestly say, that it was another successful AHS mission.....there was no breach....an' everyone was able to sleep soundly knowin' I was on the job.....includin' me. (After all. no one could get inside that door w/out me knowin' it....).

Friday, June 29, 2018

No Good Deed Goes Unpunished


Lexie an' I thought we'd give mom a break, last nite. She had a sore tooth...an' I know how that can hurt. So, we didn't even object to her closin' outside an' goin' to bed early.

She checked the doors, turned out all the lites.....gave us each our goodnite hugs an' kisses (she never ever goes to bed w/out doin' this), dad was already asleep, an' then she went into her bathroom to get into her nities an' put that good tastin' stuff on her face (I like it).

Then she turned off that lite an' opened the door to the bedroom to go to bed.

As she smacked into me...luckily we both didn't go splat.....she was able to grab onto me to keep us both upright. Hey...I was just waitin' patiently for her to come out an' give her a nite kiss, make sure she was ok, an' just lay down by her bed.

Whew...we both were glad we escaped goin' splat...me, for her not landin' on me....her for...well not landin' at all.

Then she walks w/me to her side of the bed......

She steps right into the middle of Lexie...who was layin' patiently beside mom's side of the bed. Mom jumped back....Lexie jumped up. An' mom reached down an' hugged an' petted Lexie...makin' sure she was ok. Then mom climbed into bed.

Lexie an' I decided that we tried.....an' we, also, decided that we might be safer goin' to bed ....in the livin' room.

Well, we both had decided to put mom to bed an' wait for her to nod off...givin' her some quality time. This was not how we envisioned it goin' down. It was supposed to be a sweet gesture from us......comfortin' ....lettin' her know we really cared......not a crash n' burn type of moment.

It was the thought that counts, right?

Monday, June 25, 2018

Knock before Enterin'......



AHS-RED ALERT!!!
Mom an' I were out enjoyin' the mornin'. It's warm, balmy feelin'......there's a strong breeze makin' all the crepe myrtle blooms fall like pink snow. (dad don't like this 'cause they're landin' everywhere an' pilin' up on stuff in lil' drifts of brown an' pink).

All of a sudden.....the door bell rang....

I ran inside to the kitchen windows...lettin' out a warnin'! There's a white truck parked in front of our house. (I hate white trucks). Dad opened the door to talk to some man, an' I watched from the kitchen. Then as he left to go back to his truck, I ran up to my tower to make sure he really had intentions to leave.

After I was sure he drove off, I came back downstairs just in time to hear dad tell mom that that guy an' others would be back.....to go in our backyard. That they were here to check that buried pipeline that runs across the yard way in the back.


Well, I was gonna go out w/dad to check stuff out....an' be there for security. He locked me an' Lexie in the house!


I knew somethin' was up as I watched from the backdoor.....dad was out there....an' talkin' to someone!
"They" didn't come back later....."they" jumped over my back fence an' were back there!! 


Dad told 'em that he woulda' opened the gate & made sure me an' Lexie were locked in the house. When they were finished, he took them out that way. An' he told 'em that they were lucky that I wasn't out there, that it mighta' gotten "ugly". One of the guys said that it was ok.....they find it easier to just go over the fences from yard to yard w/no problem...that he likes dogs...an' even has a couple of "weiner dogs".
Dad opened the gate for 'em...an' pointed out where that big hole in the gate had been repaired. Then said that I was a lil' bigger then a "weiner dog"....an' that there were two of us, an' that hole in the gate was us bustin' thru it after just a cat that had gotten in our backyard w/out our permission. An' that he just wasn't sure how fast they could jump a fence an' run.........


He suggested to them that they just might consider comin' to the front door an' lettin' him open the gate & makin' sure we're locked up when they come back......


We'll see.....'cause I'm on alert....an' Lexie's an' my afternoon might just get a lot more excitin'........

Thursday, June 21, 2018

Let Sleepin' Dogs Lie?...maybe not.......

Mom so wants to wake Lexie up from her nappin' w/dad in the bedroom. She reallllly does.
Lexie's sleepin' like a log......lookin' all sweet an' innocent. Mom's not feelin' it....




It all started w/the midnite game of ignorin' mom an' not wantin' to come inside. Then when mom got us all asleep..even her....me an' mom were woken up by that banshee howlin' of Lexie. Of course, Lexie didn't even wake up as mom an' I stood over her....she just snuggled down in her bed, smackin' her lips an' sleepin'.

Mom an' I went back to bed. 


Then at 2 am....Lexie's at the back door barkin' her head off....mom had to get up to tell her to knock it off an' go back to bed. Mom went back to bed...again...an' I went up to my tower for some peace an' quiet...an' some sleep. 


4:30 am.....the same thin'....mom gets up, turns on the lite in the livin' room. Lexie looks at her...an' mom yells, "NO!!"...turns off the
 lite an' goes back to bed. I think Lexie was startled...'cause it worked....she went back an' laid down.

Right at dawn....Lexie starts barkin' at the back door, again. Mom tries to just ignore...her...but Lexie wasn't havin' it. 

Lexie comes into mom's bedroom an' goes up to the side of mom....an' lets out a demandin' bark...right at mom. That was a lil' hard to ignore.....then Lexie goes to the doorway...an' barks some more...then heads to the back door.


Now, mom's thinkin' that maybe....Lexie really needs to go out an' gets up....an' lets her out.
Now....Lexie runnnns out. Mom stands at the door an' watches her......
Is it a potty break? Nooooo!


Lexie puts her nose to the ground an' is goin' helter skelter across the patio, the deck, the yard...by the pond....behind the arbor...down by the greenhouse......as fast as she can......as if she's trackin' somethin'.....


Then......she just comes right back to mom an' goes back in the house an' lays down...all satisfied an' happy like.


Mom's left standin' at the door in her jammies, at dawn....totally dumbfounded, thinkin'...."what was that all about?". It's not like Lexie heard somethin' outside thru the backdoor....she's always puttin' her nose against that crack in the door an' snortin'....but what could she have smelled that got her all up in paws to need to go out after somethin'?
Don't know, don't really care......whatever it was, it's gone, I got a good nite's sleep.......& Lexie's gettin' a good nap, so she'll be fresh for later. Mom...ehhh....maybe not....but who knows what tonite will bring.....

When did I become Lexie's "keeper"?

Midnite....

Lexie talked mom into lettin' her "out"....as if she reallllllly needed to go "out". 
It's been rainin' a lot, again, today...so, we've been locked in....again, most of the day. Only gettin' to go out sporadically. 

So, mom gave in.."just in case", she said, an' she told us "to come RIGHT back!!". An' she tapped Lexie on the nose an' pointed that finger at her, an' Lexie had no choice but to know what mom was sayin'. 
So, mom opened the door an' we literally flashed outside we were movin' so fast. 

I did a quick recon of the fence line...checked out the gate an' that back corner...did my business an' came back inside the house, where I was rewarded w/one of them mongolian cheese thingees. 


Mom went to the backdoor an' looked out.....no Lexie. Everythin' in the backyard is wet, with drippin' drops comin' off the trees an' shinin' in her lite as she moved it across the yard. About then.....mom saw her movin' across the yard...blatantly pretendin' that she didn't see mom's lite. I walked out on the deck, but didn't see her....mom told me to go get her. 


I went as far as the pond, while mom shined her lite that way. (dad got her one of them tactical lites that goes really far). I spotted Lexie...an' she spotted me lookin' at her an' saw mom's lite. She couldn't ignore me....I just looked at her an' turned towards the house. She knew exactly that the game was up an' she had to come inside. But I have to tell you, she came right on in...but she was trudgin' not trottin' down the path, lol. 


Sure hope it don't rain, tomorrow.....I think even mom's gettin' stir crazy.......good thin' I've got my tower......don't know why I'm Lexie's "keeper" all of a sudden....I really don't care if she's out in the wet an' rain.......as long as she keeps her wet self off my bed.....