Standards

Well dad came home from work, after stoppin' at the grocery store for mom on his way home.   I always like to check out stuff from the store...especially if it has to do w/anything in the fridge...you never know when they're lookin' to get rid of a bit of this or that as they load it up w/new stuff.

Anyway, I was just sittin' there in the doorway, observin' dad as he was puttin' the eggs in there.   All of a sudden...PLOP!....yep, he dropped one on the floor an' it went splat.  There was no puttin' that one back together.   He looked at me...I looked at him then back at that splatted egg..then at mom.....I didn't move, I wasn't movin'...an' above all..I didn't do it...I looked at dad.  

Then he started pickin' up the big pieces of shell....an' I'm still just observin'.   He pointed to that splatted egg an' asked me if I wanted it.....

ME EAT OFF THE FLOOR?  Is he crazy?    Guess he forgot who he was talkin' to.  About then, Lexie came into the kitchen to see what was what.  She figured out right away what was goin' on, an' was on that egg splat like white on rice.   Within' seconds, it looked like mom had mopped. Clean as a whistle....I tell you, I defy any forensic expert to find anything after Lexie's through w/cleanin' it.
Mom gave me some cheese.....she knows me...I have a little more discerning palate then Lexie does...as well as standards..an' we know what kind she's got.

Again....Me, eat an' lick off the floor?.....phffffttttt